Flexing my Butterfly Wings

 I am finally done struggling to get out of the cocoon in which I have been wrapped for... a millennium, it seems. 

 I still remember when I thought I was wounded and dying (emotionally anyway). 

I remember not understanding that the caterpillar had to change. Had to. 

 I am still a little sleepy, and am still flexing my wings, preparing to do whatever is needed to shine love out into the world. Comforting those who are still stuck in their cocoons. Encouraging those who are still caterpillars. 

These people are trying to keep their lives so busy that they 'don't have time' for the change that is upon them. And if they're too busy, then it can't possibly happen, right? 

 I try not to laugh too loud. 

There are butterflies who came out of their cocoons before me. They are kindly offering me encouragement. Because they remember the feeling of being unable to fly. 

 And I am grateful for their wisdom.

I am a leader

I went to a retreat this weekend, and discovered things about myself. I am a surprisingly good leader. Why is that so surprising to me?

I've spent my whole life living small. I have never really wanted to be the 'president' of any organization that I have been in.

I've always thought of myself as a follower. Following other people, making them look good. I didn't want the leadership role. Mostly because it means that the 'buck stops here.'

But in truth, I have always taken on a large amount of responsibility for whatever group I'm in. I have always led. I just didn't know it. And the buck has always stopped here. Because if I don't accept responsibility - who will? Usually nobody.

I'm the one people come to when they don't know where else to turn. Because I will get it done, and if the project needs more than one pair of hands, I know how to get people to work together to "git 'er done."

It's time for me to accept the title of Leader (especially since I've nearly always accepted the responsibility that goes with it.)

We shall see how my life will change with this shift in perception. Wish me luck.

In Joy
Gayle McCain